I was a bad driver

My driving career did not particularly get off to a smooth start. I actually got my license in Arizona, notoriously known for their "easy" driver's tests. I naturally failed at my first attempt. Apparently I did something horribly wrong because my behind-the-wheel portion of the test was abruptly cut short and the examiner seemed upset.

I still don't know what I did wrong. He didn't even tell me because it was apparently that obvious, and I couldn't ask because I had to pretend I knew exactly why I didn't pass. So I just tried to look solemn/contrite and then ended up crying in annoyance.

Anyway, a few years later and literally a month after I got my first car, I totaled it. I just full-on rear-ended a brand new cadillac that was stopped at a signal because I was looking to see if a particular store was open. (Embarrassingly enough it was a Morning Glory stationery store).

Now even before I got the license plates for my new car, I did something even more horrendous: I hit a pedestrian. Now before you totally judge me, let me explain the situation.

It was a busy street that had some houses along the side.  There were a bunch of cars parked on the side and when I saw a big black car (think Chevy Suburban or Cadillac Escalade with tinted windows) among them, I assumed it was also a parked car. Little did I know that it was actually a car that was stopped because a person was trying to cross the street. Let me bring your attention to the fact that there was no signal at this crosswalk and that cars on the other side of the street were just whizzing by.

So just as I was passing the big car, I see the pedestrian and in shock, I swerved out of the way!

But my reaction was too late! My friend and I hear the dreaded "THUD" and fear the worst. My heart sank and I remember vividly that instant thinking, "I just committed involuntary manslaughter. I am going to prison". Then I look in my rear view mirror to see:

She was alive! Obviously very upset and her body in some sort of weird position, but she was most definitely moving and totally with it enough to be yelling expletives at me. (Couldn't hear them but could tell by her body language/mouth movements). I saw her get up and continue walking. I was very relieved but also in a state of shock: shaken up,  heart pounding, and mind a blur. Two cars who witnessed what happened stopped me and told me to go see if she was okay, so I U-turned to go back to find her but she was already gone without a trace.

Immoral of the story: The best time to commit a "hit-and-they-run" is before you get your license plates.